Prepping for Postpartum - Transcripts

Hello and welcome to Module Two: Prepping for Postpartum.

In this module, I'm going to help you prep your food, gather your baby things, set up your stations, and put your life on autopilot so that hopefully the fourth trimester goes a lot more smoothly for you than you fear.

I'm going to take you through some of the practical steps that you can take, to help supplement what you're already doing to get ready for your baby and help you make some decisions about food, about baby gear, and day-to-day life with your baby so that you don't have to be like rechecking all of your lists and making sure you've got it done and wondering if there's anything else you can do to make the first few weeks with your baby go smoothly.

This module is it.

Welcome to Lesson Two: Prepping your food. I think besides the usual postpartum prep that families do, like buying clothes and diapers, I think prepping for food is probably the most common way that families prepare for life with their baby.

So here are some considerations and ideas to tackle this task because learning to look after a newborn baby takes time and energy. It takes so much time and energy, so much more than you think it will at the beginning, especially if you have a baby that prefers to be held, that needs a lot of soothing.

So here some ideas that you can use as you're trying to decide “How will we make sure that the folks that are looking after our baby aren’t hangry all the time?” Especially if you're the person who birthed the baby or is breastfeeding the baby, you need to fuel your recovery.

So five ideas for you to keep yourself well fed once you meet your baby is to meal prep, to batch cook, use a meal train, get meal kits, or focus on grocery delivery.

So first up, meal prep. What I mean here is that you plan all the meals that you will eat (okay, most of the meals that you will eat) in the postpartum period in advance, and then aim to fill your freezer in a whole weekend or maybe two weekends. And you can do that by yourself, you can invite friends over and have them all bring different ingredients for the meals and then set one friend to chopping and one friend to opening cans or whatever, but the goal is to batch freeze everything all in one go.

And my favorite website for this is TheFamilyFreezer.com for sure. Kelly, who runs that site, has a vast library of freezer meals that are for the Crock Pot, the Instant Pot, and even in the skillet now. And she's got a way to filter everything down through like meat preference, through gluten-free, through low sodium.

Anyway, thefamilyfreezer.com is a really good resource for meal prepping. Mostly for the Crock Pot though.

Your other option, if you don't want to do all the prep work and fill a freezer in a weekend, is to batch cook. And that just means that you cook double or triple what the recipe calls for and then save the leftovers for the postpartum period.

And that means that you can choose meals that you know freeze well, and it's much less work and cost upfront because you're not buying groceries for like six weeks. But the payoff is the same because you've got meals that you like, and all you have to do is thaw them out and warm them up.

More commonly though, I think families get set up with meal trains, and you can set this up in advance so that folks that come to your baby shower, sign up for your meal train for when the baby arrives.

Or you can share a link with your announcement, “Hey, the baby's arrived. We welcome your sign-ups to our meal train to make sure that we're well.” Or you can let somebody else completely run it for you. For me, our church has a team that is dedicated to setting up meal trains for folks that need a little extra help.

You can talk to a friend, a coworker, someone that you love and trust to run that for you and set it up in advance. And there are lots of different websites that do this for you. Here are two ideas: MealTrain.com and TakeThemAMeal.com, and my suggestion for you is to plan for three meals a week for six weeks.

And if you have preferences or like dietary needs, make sure you specify those upfront, especially on mealtrain or takethemameal.com. You can list them all out so that people know not to bring you food with dairy in it, for example. And please allow yourself to take the pressure off and let other people serve you and support you. And you can also get a manageable flow of visitors and well wishers to reconnect with and show your baby off too.

And then another option to consider, of course, is meal kits. And there are lots of different kinds, but they're really good for having a set meal plan for your week so that you know exactly what you're going to eat, you don't have to make any decisions,

You don't have to go grocery shopping for each of the individual groceries inside the recipes, but some of the meal kits do take more prep time than others, so make sure that you understand what you're signing up for. I'm thinking like HelloFresh or Blue Apron, there's a bunch of others, but I think HelloFresh has a reputation for having meals that are a bit long and complex to prepare.

Another downside is you still have to choose your meals every week. Like you can't plan them out for weeks and weeks in advance, just one week at a time, but there are some services that allow you to shop for recipes and groceries. So we use HungryRoot a couple of times a month, and that allows us to order five dinners a week, but we can also add on yogurt cups or apples or a bag of rice here or there on top of the meals, to supplement the other meals that we're eating that week.

And even though it might feel pricey, it's certainly almost everywhere, more expensive than shopping at the grocery store yourself, but remember, it's only temporary. And it's important to find a way to make the fourth trimester easier for yourself.

And lastly, of course, you could just keep doing grocery delivery, which, you know, thanks to the last three years, I guess, grocery stores have gotten really good at, some grocery stores have gotten really good at, and we've gotten more practice using it too, right?

It means though that you do have a bit more work to do in the postpartum period, but you can just do it from home. Fill your cart from your sofa, drive over to the store a few hours later, or send someone to collect the groceries for you, or have someone drop it off at your door.

And it's even better if you have a place where you can set up a standing order that gets delivered on a weekly basis. I'm thinking here, outside Seattle, we have a company called Smith Brothers. They deliver the same milk and butter, bagels and cream cheese every single Monday morning to our porch, whether we remember to update our order or not .

And sometimes that's really good. Sometimes that's just what you need, to check that part of your to-do list off, to take it out of your mind and focus on what matters.

And of course, for the bonus, just order takeout. Go easy on yourselves, don't overcomplicate things and ask yourself, how can we make this easy?

All right, so your to-do for this lesson is before you hop into the next video, please take some time to decide which of these five, six-ish meal prep methods you like, how you will eat, what you will eat, in the first six or 10 weeks after your baby is born, and then take the first step to make one of those happen.

It's a really good way to look after yourself.

Welcome to lesson two, Gathering your Baby things. Now, I think it's important to start with the caveat that all the baby gear in the world won't make this any easier. So don't get caught up in the idea that there is a magic thing that you can buy that will give you the dream postpartum that you're looking for, but there are certainly things that you need to have on hand.

And so my goal for this lesson is to give you a chance to go through your gathered baby gear so that you can fill in any gaps in the next week or two as you're looking ahead to your upcoming birth. And it's important to remember that there's just a few things that your baby needs to start off with.

You need to keep them warm.

You need to keep them clean.

You need to keep them well fed.

And so to that end, make sure you have the clothes that are appropriate to the season, diapers and wipes to keep them clean, and make a plan for what and how you want to feed your baby.

And the amount of stuff that you can buy can be overwhelming but here are the essentials. So focus on the essentials, and then when you meet your baby, you can decide whether you need some extra stuff.

All right? The essentials for yourself and your recovery, if you're the birthing parent:

overnight pads, whatever your favorite brand or kind is. Just the ones that are like a bit larger capacity because your uterus will continue to bleed for several weeks, two or three or five weeks after you've had your baby as it resets itself to its non-pregnant state. So prepare yourself for that.

You might also appreciate having your own container of tucks pads, or witch hazel that you can apply to your own menstrual pads for the health of your perineum.

Additionally, if you're going to be breastfeeding, you'll appreciate having nursing pads to catch leaking milk or ointment for your nipples.

You should also have on hand lots of tasty food for your recovery and a big bottle of water because hydration is so important.

I've heard that a water bottle with a straw helps you to drink more water without thinking about it. So consider that. Our hospital where I had my second baby, I think our first as well, gave us like a giant several gallon water bottle for me to take home and drink lots of water from.

And I've included here two options for books that you can read if you've got the time and energy for that right now, for yourself and your recovery. The first is the very popular, The First 40 Days by Heng Ou. She's an herbalist and a Chinese medicine person. And she authored this really great book that includes some practices from her family tradition, and lots of good recipes for food to eat, to fuel your recovery that are tasty and healthy and nourishing.

And then, Strong as a Mother by Kate Rope is another good book for yourself and your recovery, but it's written much more casually. It's more a series of blog posts that will make you feel totally validated in whatever it is that you're going through in this next stage with your baby.

Some important baby gear for your baby.

You'll need a safe sleep space. And that means a firm mattress, free of blankets, bumpers, toys.

An infant car seat that's been safely installed. Whether you plan to take your baby anywhere or not, most hospitals at least require that you bring a car seat to carry the baby out in.

One baby holding thing that's not their bed, like a bouncy seat or a swing, or perhaps a floor gym.

A baby carrier, like a wrap. That's the long fabrics that you wrap around yourself, a ring sling, which is a long fabric that has a double ring on one side, or a buckled carrier, which is like a backpack or a front pack for the baby with adjustable straps.

And three to five big muslin blankets or fleece blankets, if you're giving birth in a cold season.

And of course diapers and wipes you'll probably want to start with a small pack of newborn diapers but don't buy too many of those because most babies outgrow them. If they're growing well, they outgrow them within two or three weeks maybe.

And if you're at all curious about cloth diapers, send me an email because I would love to talk to you about cloth diapers.

And to help you out with your baby, here are two really great books to read. We liked, my husband, especially liked The Happiest Baby on the Block by Harvey Karp. It's a fairly lighthearted and optimistic read about soothing babies and what babies need, how to look after a baby.

And Emily Oster wrote a great book called Crib Sheet as a follow up to her pregnancy book. But Emily Oster is an economist, I think an economics professor, and so her book is a lot more data driven. It's a lot more about statistics and what makes for a good postpartum based on what the data says compared to what your doctor's suggesting, if you're into that kind of thing.

All right. And if you're planning to breastfeed or body feed your baby, you'll want to have these supplies on hand, for sure:

Nursing pads, either disposable or reusable so that you can wash them and not have to throw them away.

Some kind of nipple ointment, like lanolin is a popular one. You'll probably get some from the hospital.

A nursing bra or tank that has a little clasp here at the top that you can open up

A Haakaa for milk collection and occasional passive pumping.

It's it's like a little plastic container that's squishy that uses its own squishy suction to attach to your breast, which you can use to collect milk when you're nursing your baby on the other side, if you have a strong letdown, or you can use it for pumping just enough milk for one feeding sometimes.

And in terms of pumps, you can have on hand a double electric pump if you need to store milk because you're going back to work really quickly. Then that's a must have.

If that's not a concern, if you're not going back to work right away and you don't need to store four or five feedings per day, then a single electric pump or a manual pump might be a better fit for you.

And that's if you plan on sharing one bottle a day with your partner for an overnight feeding, for example, or if you just need to go out with friends, for lunch and then come back, then a manual pump might be an even better option for you because some women just respond better to manual pump than electric one. And of course a few bottles for sharing feedings if you plan to do that.

Two great books to read about breastfeeding are the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding by La Leche League International and Guilt-Free Bottle Feeding by Madeline Morris. And again, these two books exist on opposite spectrums. The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding is very like, extremely attachment parenting philosophy because that's what La Leche League is all about.

Whereas Guilt-Free Bottle Feeding is more about like why nobody should feel guilty using formula to feed their baby because it is a scientific marvel. We should all be very grateful that we have formula. But the author of Guilt-Free Bottle Feeding probably doesn't love La Leche League because La Leche League can sometimes make women feel guilty for wanting to do anything but breastfeeding.

So if you feel a bit sensitive about that, maybe don't read La Leche League. And if you want more information about how or why to bottle feed your baby formula, for example, Guilt-Free Bottle Feeding might be the right book for you.

And then for baby sleep, I'll get into this in a lot more detail in the next module, but the basics that you need for baby sleep are:

a firm flat sleep surface

a couple of different swaddles or swaddling sleep sacks that your baby can grow through

I love a good white noise machine, that Hatch Rest, Hatch Baby white noise machine is really good. There's one that's called Hushh with two hs at the end, H U S H H. And that's just a small portable battery powered one, which will not fail you if the power goes out. And you can just hang that off the side of your baby's bassinet or wherever they're sleeping.

Having somewhere to track your baby's sleep will also be really useful. For those of you that like to gather data

and a baby carrier can be really useful for baby's sleep too

And the two books that I have read that I really liked for baby sleep are Sweet Sleep and Precious Little Sleep. And these, again, are on opposite ends of the spectrum. La Leche League also published Sweet Sleep, which is all about why you should feel perfectly safe and comfortable bed sharing with your baby, especially if you're breastfeeding them.

Whereas Precious Little Sleep is more about why you should feel perfectly fine about sleep training your baby. Not at the beginning, of course, but like when they are 4, 5, 6, 8 months a year old. Why it's okay to put boundaries around sleep so that you can look after yourself.

That's it for the basics of the things that you need to look after a baby and yourself.

So go through this list and your gathered baby gear and decide if there are any gaps that you need to fill in the next week or two. And then check in with me for the next module, setting up your stations.

All right, here we are in lesson three, Setting up your Stations. So I'm going to help you organize your baby things so that you have three stations set up: a changing station where you'll clean up your baby, a feeding station where you'll spend quite a lot of your time, and a dedicated sleep space for your baby.

So all the new baby stuff that's coming in needs a home. And not just so that you can keep your stuff organized, but so that there's somewhere where you can put your baby things when you're done with them that everyone else knows where it is too, so that no one's running around asking, “where is that diaper ointment”, or the nursing pads or whatever,

So here's what you need to set up for your diaper changing station. And remember, you can change your baby anywhere. You can do that on the floor, on the sofa, or the bed, but it's easier for everyone if that spot is the dedicated baby changing spot, whether that's on the floor, the sofa, a bed, or like a proper like changing table, and then whatever that spot is, stock it with supplies that you'll need.

diapers, wipes and ointment

also burp cloths, for when your baby spits up

baby distractions or some kind of entertainment for the baby

a sheet or a pad to protect the surface of whatever it is that you're using as a diaper changing station

and perhaps you also want to have clothes and lotions available for changing your baby's clothes in that same spot.

And this is also the spot that you'll bring your diaper bag to, your travel bag to, and restock for when you're ready to take your baby out and about.

The second one is a feeding station. And in this case, I want to encourage you not to start from scratch. A special spot that you like to get cozy in right now, when you're pregnant, just use that and build that up. You already have one. Don't make it more complicated, right?

And because many babies snooze, they have a little sleep when they're all done feeding, make sure that it's comfortable for your baby, but also totally not boring for you. So you want to make sure that you have:

Books

your cell phone charger

your Kindle

the Nintendo switch

the remote control for the tv

Whatever you need to entertain yourself while your baby is snoozing, make sure that you have that handy. And you'll want to stock it with some supplies that are related to feeding your baby. So, if you're breastfeeding:

nursing pads

silverettes

maybe a nipple ointment

a haakaa pump

some burp cloths and wipes

or small blankets for if your baby spits up or if you want to keep them extra warm when they're snoozing on you

You might appreciate having a feeding tracker, whether you're logging minutes that they're nursing or the amount of ounces that they're drinking out of a bottle. And you can keep track of that with an app on your phone, or a pen and paper, the old-fashioned way. Again, make sure you have a charger handy for your devices, and of course, stock it with your giant water bottle, which somebody else should refill for you at regular intervals. And make sure there's lots of snacks for you to eat.

And then the last station that you should stock for your baby is the sleep spot. Now, the location in the first few weeks does not matter at all, but your preparation of that spot does. So even though most families prepare a separate room as the sleeping space or the nursery for the baby, most families also room share with their babies next to their beds for the first several months.

And of course that's because the AAP recommends that babies should be room sharing with their parents for the first six to 12 months. So whatever you decide about where the baby should sleep, just make sure that you prepare it. It doesn't matter where it happens.

So your baby's safe sleep space should be firm, flat, free of blankets, bumpers, toys, gaps and strings, whether that is their own bassinet, a separate sleep surface that's next to your bed, like a sidecar co-sleeper, for example, or whether you're bed sharing, as long as it's prepared and safe.

And then stock that with your own supplies, like clean sheets and swaddles that you can use in case the baby spits up all over whatever they're wearing. I like white noise and a nightlight. The hush white noise machine is really nice. The hatch white noise machine is really nice because it's got a built-in nightlight that you can set with your phone, and of course, burp cloths and wipes.

And so before you hop on to the next lesson, decide on a spot for each of these stations, a feeding station, a diaper changing station, and a sleep spot, and then stock them up with the supplies that you need.

Okay, let's talk about how to put your life on autopilot here in the brief window of time that you have before you have your baby and everything starts to feel like it's slipping away. Let's make sure that it's taken care of and you don't have to have any regrets about the things that you missed looking after.

And I want to make sure that you take some time to do this because baby care and self-care will end up taking a lot more of the time and energy than what you've actually got available. And so every non-baby task that you leave for your future self will be a strain on you and your partner on your energy reserves.

So every single task that you can automate or delegate, even if it's only temporarily for the next couple of weeks is a gift to future you. Okay? So look at it that way. And then, yeah, let's find a way to set all these things on autopilot. Okay?

And the best way to do this, the best way to go about this, I think, is to start tracking all the household things that you manually take care of in a day, in a week, every month and then find a way to automate, outsource, or delegate. And so here are some things that I want you to keep track of in these last few weeks before you meet your baby.

For example, take two minutes with every bill that you manually pay in the next 60 days, and set it to autopay. And this includes your utilities, your subscriptions, any investments that you make, your credit cards.

If there's a way to set it to autopay, do it now because you don't want to let any of those things fall through the cracks.

The other thing I want you to consider is to outsource which of your chores, like housekeeping things, you can hand off to a professional service for the first eight weeks with your baby.

Not forever, but just for this little while so that you can take the time that you want to spend with your baby.

So I'm thinking grocery shopping and cooking like we talked about in lesson one, perhaps look around and see if there's a laundry service you can make use of. Is there somebody else that could walk the dog or come clean your house?

It's only temporary and it will give you the time that you want with your baby.

And also think about the things that you have to do on a daily or weekly basis that you can delegate to someone else. I'm thinking like getting the mail, taking the garbage cans to the front, looking after an older child that you've got, taking them to school or practice or whatever.

And I want to remind you that just because you can do it all yourself, or because other people do it all by themselves, you don't have to. You get to choose. And asking for help or accepting an offer of help can feel awkward in your community in this day and age even, but every task that you hold onto now, will impede on the time that you can be spending with your baby, with your partner, or for yourself.

So remember your vision, like your dreamy dream vision of the postpartum period, and then do what you can to make that vision a reality. So your to-do for this lesson is to set the next round of bills to autopay and decide which tasks you can hand off to somebody else for the next little while.

Alright, we talked in this module all about getting yourself ready for parenthood. So here are the things that I hope you've had a chance to do for this module.

You've prepared your food or decided how you will do it. You got all the baby gear that you need. You've set up your three stations. And you've been able to put the rest of your life on autopilot.

Okay. Before you move on to the next module though, make sure that you have completed the to-dos in the lessons from this module, okay? This is the practical stuff that's going to take the longest amount of time out of all of the modules, but when it's done, it will make your whole fourth trimester run more smoothly.

So here are the things that I've asked you to do:

to decide what and how you will eat once the baby arrives. I hope you've taken the first steps to prepping your food for your postpartum.

After you've made that decision, you have an inventory of your baby gear and you're going to fill the gaps with the essentials that I've given you .

You've set up a changing station, a feeding station, and a safe baby sleep space.

You've reviewed your monthly bills and set them to autopay and outsourced and delegated your other tasks, right?

So the next step then is to attend our next Q and A call. If you've got a question, if you want to share your story, you want to get some feedback, come to the next call.

The dates and times are all listed on the website, and of course you can email me anytime. I'd love to hear from you. I hope this has been useful for you and I look forward to seeing you in the next module, all about how to look after a newborn.